#HOPE DEFERRED MAKES THE HEART SICK HOW TO#

Seemed to take forever for me and to be met with closed doors and failure. Getting pregnant, adopting, getting approved for foster care, filling out simple forms. It seemed like God was actively blocking my attempts. Then I gave up on that and prayed for embryo adoption for years. Then I gave up on that and prayed for adoption for years.

First I prayed for God to heal my infertility. I prayed for over a decade to have children.

#HOPE DEFERRED MAKES THE HEART SICK HOW TO#

Ever since this longing was cut off, I've been in a rut and depressed.Дoes anyone have any advice or encouragement for how to get out of this funk and actually trust God again? (I'm afraid now, after He seemed to call me to something specific and then cut it off after I spent five years moving towards it/trusting completely that He would work out the details despite the uncertainty, and praying about it!!) Or have you waited and prayed for something for a long time, only to be disappointed (or maybe to have your prayer answered in a different way, or have God teach you something through the experience)? I feel like I have nothing to say to God right now, nor do I know if I can even hear from Him. I feel let down and betrayed, and I'm doubting everything I have supposedly heard from Him. etc., I can't help but feel appalled that God allowed me to go down this path without stopping or correcting me. Even though intellectually I know that God is good, loves us dearly, only gives good gifts to His children, will never let us down etc. I was never able to fully settle down in the new city I moved to or find a close group of friends here, so the move feels like a waste of time and resources and I feel like I threw away a not insignificant portion of my life. Recently this dream was completely and irrevocably crushed. I questioned and prayed often about it over the years and always felt at peace about it, both at the time God impressed it on me and each time I prayed-it always felt like an invitation to have faith and wait patiently for His perfect timing.

I sacrificed some incredible opportunities and even moved long distance across several states (alone to a new city in my mid/late 20's) in pursuit of this hope/longing. For just about five years now, I've been waiting and working towards a specific goal/dream of the future that I sincerely believed God clearly placed on my heart (and which I thought He confirmed).

Hope deferred makes the heart sick